Cold Feet

resolved

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 13:19:21 GMT

resolved: no more fucking around on the internet & other dysfunctional computing habits. well, less, and more managed.

resolved: will do daily tasks daily: mail, catlitter, dishes, laundry

resolved: will make daily progress on the Big Tasks that need to be done before Yoohoo

resolved: will not wallow in depression

i am owl!queue!

Big O

Fri, 25 Apr 2008 14:53:14 GMT

Hi there - M just posted a video of the Big O walking through the woods. Perhaps too sappy for a non family member? Or perhaps not?

YOU be the judge:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bMSrzzrRpjw

--Beep

philly etc

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 15:11:43 GMT

yo beep --

So what do you think of Pennsylvania's primary?

Also, how were your teeth and gums? Is it like a tornado in a trailer park in there? (oh, oh, yes I know that was offensive. it's okay. these are my people, except my mom couldn't even afford a trailer.)

--owl

Hey!

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 10:50:57 GMT

Haven't posted in a bit - sorry about that! Re: antidepressants - that does suck. I had a doctor once who refused to write a prescription for a generic version of my drug b/c "you never know". He had name-brand freebies all over his office. I switched doctors.

I'm currently procrastinating going to the dentist because I haven't been in forever. My gums look really messed up and I'm afraid of what they'll say. How stupid am I?

I'm cranky today and I have a lot of work to do, plus an "employee issue". Sigh.

Love to owl

---beep

theme & picture

Thu, 17 Apr 2008 19:59:48 GMT

okay i changed our "theme" so that we could display our individual user pics in our posts. this makes me happy. also it wasted a good 10 minutes of my life.

my antidepressant dose is going up, in part because the fucking insurance company won't cover the non-generic formulation of the one-a-day version of my current dose; i fail to maintain medication schedule on a two-a-day dose. so, i either have to increase, or decrease, my dose, in order to get the generic version of my medication.

how fucked up is that?

hard hard day

Wed, 16 Apr 2008 01:34:53 GMT

today was a hard day.

we had a dr appt at 945 -- we're into the every 2 weeks schedule. that went fine. afterwards we were supposed to go see one of m's colleagues who had a baby on sunday -- but we got into a silly fight just beforehand so i was pissy, and went home afterward instead of having lunch with m.

at home i discovered that the water was turned off -- without notice -- by people working in the basement. then i discovered that the gas was also turned off -- without notice. annoyed i went out to a cafe to work. but i was unproductive.

then i came home and the house was filled with gas. why? because the men working had put the gas back on but while it was off our pilot lights in our stove went off, of course. they hadn't thought of this. i was quite angry. so i dealt with our house, then went through and dealt with the other apartments.

i called & bitched to the landlord. the landlord (D) wants to be our friend. she's a nice woman & she's an activist & i support that, but we have a business relationship, and that doesn't really work well with friendship. for instance she increases our rent every year, come hell or high water. and we moved in knowing it was a fixer-upper, but appreciating the general vibe and the layout and the promise of a collegial cooperative-style housing arrangement. but the collegial cooperative-style housing arrangement never manifested: she moved in a girl (K/G) she was fucking onto another floor and that went south quickly. that person was annoying as hell with a dog that barked all the time, and K/G let it shit in the small patch of green on the side of our house. where the garbage is kept. the garbage that K/G doesn't ever take to the curb.

anyway that person was replaced by 3 people -- one putatively queer girl, one straight girl, and one straight boy. there are many people in and out of the house and the straight girl's boyfriend i believe basically lives here. which means one more car to compete with for parking in front of our house. very annoying.

anyway people were working in the basement loudly until 9 at night. (we're on the first floor so when i say loudly i mean it.) i went down at 830 and told them to wrap it up.

.... the good news is that yoohoo is doing fine: very active, possibly a little big for her/his age.

-- owl

back to religious cults:

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 20:20:15 GMT

Some relevant links:

yemeni 8-year-old has to sue for divorce herself

desert news - i'm told has good coverage of the mormon fundy cult

bill maher "new rules" on pedophilic cults

-- owl

babbitt disappoints

Sat, 12 Apr 2008 04:33:32 GMT

that's really too bad about babbitt. he was one of he clinton administrators i didn't half mind.

... yo -- i learned a cool CSS trick just now. to make text or symbols or whatever always appear in a particular element, you can use

ELEMENT: BEFORE {
CONTENT: sometext-or-string-or-code
; }

the tricky thing, for me anyway, is that to use the usual ISO html codes (like ">" for "greater than"), you have to use a unicode hexadecimal. it took me a long time to figure that and then to figure out what the hell the typographic symbol that i wanted was called in plain english (apparently, "raquo" - right angled quotation) and then how to get that in unicode and in HEX unicode.

but now i have things like, on my blog at http://lquilter.net/blog/ , everything that i tag with <cite> </cite> automatically gets a little » in front of it. heh heh.

and so, content, i can now go to sleep.

good night!

--a wiser owl

Those Adorable Polygamists

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 15:24:51 GMT

Here's disturbing quote from a Phoenix New Times story in 2002:

"Colorado City was once called Short Creek. It became infamous in 1953 after Governor Howard Pyle ordered state police to arrest and jail all married men on charges of bigamy, adultery and rape. Pyle also ordered the National Guard to round up all the women and children and bring them to Phoenix, where they were held as wards of the state for two years.

Pyle's action proved disastrous to his political future. Photographs of police pulling babies from their fathers' arms inflamed public opposition to the raid. Prosecutors were unable to secure significant convictions because it was difficult to prove bigamy since most of the marriages were not legally recorded.

"You get killed quicker in government doing your duty than turning your back," Pyle was quoted as saying at the time, according to a March 4, 2001, article in the Denver Post.

Pyle was defeated in the next election.

The hands-off policy continued during former attorney general and governor Bruce Babbitt's era. In a 1986 Associated Press article, Babbitt defended the residents as hardworking, God-fearing people and said he did not want to delve into personal lives."

hugs then plus more

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 14:55:54 GMT

hugs to little O, and to you!

is the move definite? are you guys really seriously looking now?

more from liz (my friend) on the current status of the mormon people: http://badgerbag.typepad.com/badgerbag/

--owl

Iron GILF

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 13:54:19 GMT

G in GILF = grandmother.

I'm sorry about Hannah. I remember her bday due to Suka, who's been gone so long! I miss her still. N--- loved her. :-( We are currently pet-free, but looking to remedy that after we move.

I would characterize my stay at M----- as representing my fear of change and fear of failure rather than any excess of skill at maintaining stability. That said, I have had a lot of different kinds of jobs at M----- since starting, so it hasn't been boring (mostly). M----- is a good place to work for someone like me, and I tend to grow more comfortable with being assertive and dealing with people over time. So frequent changes of job wouldn't work for me. It takes me a while to get comfortable.

O---- is home today with a fever and I'm trying to work while he clings to me. So I have no great insights for you at this time.

news and questions

Fri, 11 Apr 2008 13:05:07 GMT

dear beep,

GILF? I'm familiar with MILF. Is GILF = girl ... ? or something else? gorgon ...?

on the Pelosi letter: Wow, that is awesome. She's certainly been my favorite of the major congressional delegates from California -- Boxer has done nothing of late as far as I can tell, and the only times I hear anything from DiFi it's just something that pisses me off.

In case you haven't been glued to twitter, our neighbors have been putting their dog on the 2d floor balcony every day this week, leaving it to bark all damn day. M just flipped and left a verrrry long voicemail on their message. I was cringing. Why? I hate conflict & they're nice people mostly; maybe on vacation. But why oh why am I so goddamn conciliatory & conflict-aversive? It's annoying.

Hannah is going downhill. She has bouts where she doesn't want to eat. She's down to 7 pounds. This saddens me greatly. I want her to be here for Yoohoo! We'll probably have to make hard decisions in the next few months. Oh this sucks. ... Her 19th birthday is Tuesday, 4/15.

... you have been at -- wow, I was going to say "H---"; shades of Chicago! -- M--- for a while now. Like, 7 years or something? How have you done that? I get so bored after doing anything for more than -- well, I don't know, a couple of years. And I get frustrated. ... In retrospect, I look back and feel like I failed at all those things that I eventually left; even if at the time I left on a high note of some sort. You have managed to have stability & continuity. How? What is your secret, Beep?

-- owl

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 19:39:50 GMT

My Pelosi crush is totally nonsexual, although Mike calls her the Iron GILF. Anyhoo, here's a description of the letter thing:

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2008/03/28/pelosi-responds-to-clinton-donors/

I also heard her say on one of the Sunday talk shows that the letter was completely unimportant and silly. I like the way she plays hardball. Why does it irritate me so much when Hillary does it? Actually that's not what irritates me about Hillary. In a way I admire her being so damn tough and hanging in there and not having the first serious female contender go down in flames. I always liked her better than Bill. But you're right, she voted for all this bad stuff and will compromise on everything and sell out. Shit.

really? pelosi?

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 18:48:00 GMT

beep, you must tell me more about this clinton smackdown.

as for linen & ginnin' -- i'm right there with you but i think i'll have some girlie sweet drink like, hmm, an amaretto sour. i think it's a day for an amaretto sour. on the grass. although i would also be content with a dry champagne.

instead i'm off for another bout of therapy. really.

--owl

Weather

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 18:06:51 GMT

The weather here is incredible and wonderful and I want to leave work early, get into the convertible I do not own and drive down the GW Parkway by the Potomac. Then I want to put on linen clothing and go sit in an outdoor cafe and drink a gin and tonic.

Instead, now I'm off to a budget meeting.

But first! You are no doubt correct re: the next President being fucked. There is simply too much awful stuff, and I keep thinking about Bill Clinton and what a stupid beginning he had to his presidency. But I cannot WAIT for the tremendous sigh of vast relief I will breathe when Dumbass leaves office.

Related - I have a girl crush on Nancy Pelosi. I liked the way she smacked down the Clintons and those donors that wrote her a threatening letter.

This is fun!

---beep

therapy, or, paying money to bitch about the world

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 15:31:23 GMT

dear beep,

at therapy today i talked about the triple crown of angst: (1) pre-parental jitters, (2) professional self-doubt, & (3) the world is going to shit. these 3 are intimately entwined!

i will now read "a polygamous mormon sect affidavit", do my scrabulous words, try to work on a possible book proposal, try to do a 9-months-overdue paper that wasn't really my thing but i guess i'm the last sucker who'll actually do it even though i don't WANT to do it and i may just start it from scratch which is a LOT of work, and return an unwatched DVD to the library ...

i don't know about your area of the world, but here in boston spring has sprung. in fact summer has sprung. the weather is somewhat glorious.

i am sending you warm thoughts of distraction to sustain you during boring management meetings.

love,

owl

Polygamy Affidavit

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 14:11:42 GMT

is here:

http://www.slate.com/id/2188574/

Sigh. I'm listening to a briefing on business processes right now. SO DULL! Want to not listen. Want to sleep.

-----beep

yeah!

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 12:29:39 GMT

dear beep,

I think I should read the Jon Krakauer book. Because I like to wallow in horror. It's the thing to do before the baby comes, I think!

I recently told M -- who has been supporting Hilary "for our daughter" -- that all things being equal I would prefer Obama. I had stayed out of it, mostly, because, really I don't care just so long as the Republicans get out. But sometimes I thought perhaps she assumed I was on the same bandwagon & that was Not So. Hilary voted for the war in Iraq, voted to support a flag-burning amendment, and voted Bad on multiple civil rights issues that I care about. A blank slate with good rhetorical skills is better than that. And I think there's a chance that Obama has some sincerity or good intentions. Although I am mostly cynical about politicians.

And I too am fucking scared about John McCain. WTF with all the liberals & "independents" & so-called moderates who think that he's a sane and reasonable person? WTF with Jon Stewart, apparently? I mean, come on. As for the Dems exploding -- if anyone can do it it's the fucking Democratic party. I don't know about Obama's electability. I'm sort of pinning my hopes on McCain fucking things up. He's talking more religious & talking more pro-Bush & more pro-war -- hopefully that'll be enough to tag him with the current dislike of Republicans. And if the economy continues to tank -- and how can it not? -- common wisdom has it that favors the Dems.

OTOH I think -- the next president is fucked. Because our economy is fucked, and the war is fucked, and the environment is fucked. So in political terms, I don't think people are going to be happy in 2012; will a poor performance in the interim make people swing even more crazily towards fascism and anti-immigrant hysteria? But I can't worry too much about the political terms.

Did I tell you that I'm back on antidepressants? I wish someone would tell me about procrastination. I have procrastinated many serious, big things the last year or two and I am fucked now. Sort of. I think. Or maybe not. I'm going to therapy now.

Hugs,

Owl

PS - C is visiting in May, for our baby shower! fun times.

dear owl

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 11:57:38 GMT

I too am thinking a lot about the Warren Jeffs thing. I read Jon Krakauer's book on the Mormon fundamentalists about a year ago, and it freaked my shit out. If you feel like really getting depressed and wallowing in horror, read that book. Otherwise, do not.

I'm also thinking about the campaign, and whether voting for Obama was the right thing to do or a giant mistake. And whether the Democrats are going to implode in a giant ball of fire in Denver. And whether John F-ing McCain might actually be our next president. Or, as some blog calls him, "the crazy old man with his funny little arms and his 1000 year war." Did you see that he calls his wife a cunt sometimes? Awesome.

Aaaand I'm thinking about work because I'm doing this executive training thing where I get TONs of feedback from people and take all these analysis tests like Meyers Briggs except different and sometimes better. So I'm analyzing myself and how I am at work and why I procrastinate so much and why I'm so passive sometimes and how annoying stereotypically female that is.

Plus, I have cramps.

----beep

warren jeffs

Wed, 09 Apr 2008 21:15:11 GMT

dear beep,

we didn't do much writing lately, did we? life and other things i guess.

lately i've been spending a lot of time spinning my wheels about religion in this country. the warren jeffs stuff is freaking me out. i keep thinking about all the ways that religious education simply robs people of freedom in the worst way: it not only gives them wrong information, it affirmatively destroys the critical reasoning and thinking skills that might otherwise help someone figure out when they've been given the wrong idea.

needless to say this is making me reflect probably too much on my own life. all my moments of credulity and cowardice and complicity.

i wonder what you're thinking of, these days, and i thought i'd post here instead of IMing you.

love,

owl

Picture Post: The Cutest Zombie Ever

Wed, 01 Nov 2006 14:37:36 GMT

Here he is:

And here he is in cuter mode with his brother:

And the Big O looking O-dorable:

happy birthday two days late

Mon, 09 Oct 2006 12:03:48 GMT

happy birthday dear owl! how do we like being *cough* in our late thirties?

happy birthday, dear beep

Mon, 02 Oct 2006 12:13:33 GMT

happy birthday to you

-- owl

I'm Baaaaaack

Thu, 24 Aug 2006 11:58:39 GMT

Howdy, y'all. Alabama was a stressful time, as per usual. My mother got upset because Mr. Pooge prefers my Aunt G to her, and kept passive-aggressively talking about it while he was in the room. As if you can guilt a 4-year-old into loving you. Fortunately for her, the Big O is too young to develop preferences; he loves anyone who smiles at him. So they had some quality Grandma time while Mr. Pooge played with others. My mother also lectured me on "controlling my child" when Mr. Pooge was playing in my aunt's yard with Cousin K's boyfriend (tackling, throwing dirt at each other, etc.). Sigh. I lost my composure, and yelled, causing her to tearfully confront me about it at least four more times before I could get away and on the road back home.

The Big O does not enjoy car travel. Enough said.

In happier news, Cousin K seems to be turning her life around a bit. She's living with a gainfully employed boyfriend who seems to treat her well and shares her love of animals and heavy metal music. She is taking community college classes and passing them, while possibly developing a career advising rich people who want to buy horses on what animals to buy. She's also into home improvement and cooking. She finally seems happy.

Husband and I went to Memphis for a couple of days of kid-free time. It was pleasant, though blisteringly hot during the day. Husband got to go to Sun Studios and stand at the microphone Elvis used to record something or other. I ate a lot of barbecue and hung out at the hotel pool/spa. We spent too much money.

What's new in Owl-land?

--Beep

what, still not pregnant?

Fri, 11 Aug 2006 14:02:43 GMT

You know, I hate the people who are trying to get pregnant. I hate and resent them and know that I will particularly hate them when they do in fact get pregnant before me. (At the same time I don't wish infertility on them.)

I hate that my gf told everyone she knows that I was trying to get pregnant. I hate that I've told people. I especially hate that it got brought up at our wedding. I feel that has totally jinxed us. I feel we should divorce (in Massachusetts), civilly unregister (in California), and officially break up, just so we can get back together again with a clean slate sans pregnancy jinxes.

I hope you're having a wonderful time in Alabama & not getting up to too much hankypanky with the boys in the park. Or in the church parking lot, cough cough, if you know what I mean.

-- owl @ queue